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Finding Your Purpose (Without Forcing It)

A silhouette of a person standing on a cliff edge at sunset, looking up into a vibrant, star-filled sky. The text “Finding Your Purpose” overlays the image, suggesting introspection and connection to something greater.
Your purpose doesn’t have to shout. Sometimes it finds you in the quiet moments when you look up, take a breath, and remember who you are underneath the noise.

I used to think purpose was something you uncovered with enough journaling, quizzes, and late-night YouTube rabbit holes.

My real purpose didn’t arrive with fireworks. It arrived in a slow, quiet moment when I realised I wasn’t trying to fix myself anymore, I was trying to understand myself. That’s where everything shifted.

So if you’re stuck in the “what’s my purpose?” spiral, this isn’t another feel-good cliché. It’s a reflection of how I actually found it. And how you can too.

A foggy forest road lined with trees, fading into the distance. The image evokes uncertainty, reflection, and the quiet persistence of moving forward without full clarity.
Sometimes finding your purpose feels like this walking a path you can’t fully see yet. But fog doesn’t mean you’re lost. It means you’re in it. Keep going.

Why Purpose Matters (Even If You’re Not “There” Yet)

Purpose isn’t about branding yourself with a perfect statement.

It’s about being anchored when everything else feels uncertain.

When you don’t know your purpose, it’s easy to:

  • Chase the next shiny thing hoping it will “click”

  • Second-guess every decision

  • Feel like you’re behind even when you’re working hard

When you do know it though, even just a little, it can shift how you show up.

You stop needing validation. You start acting in alignment.

That’s why purpose matters.

Not for clarity on paper. For clarity in your body.

How I Found My Purpose (And What Shifted)

I. The Search

I’d been soul-searching for years.

I’d ask friends what they thought my purpose was. I’d Google tools like Ikigai. I wanted something to land, something to tell me who I was.

But nothing felt real until I was asked to stop thinking so hard, and start noticing who I already was.


II. I Got Stuck in the External Tools Trap

I tried everything:

  • Purpose-finding frameworks

  • YouTube explainers

  • Group coaching sessions (where the direction didn’t quite fit)

It all helped… but none of it made me believe it.


III. Then My Own Words Showed Up

Words like:

Support. Help. Amplify. Knowledge.

I’d heard them before. I just didn’t realise they were trying to tell me something.


IV. The Breakthrough

It came when I looked back at every job I’d had.

Suddenly, it all made sense.

I wasn’t jumping from thing to thing. I was circling one deep theme:

Supporting people to move forward by trusting who they already are.

That’s my purpose. Not because it sounds clever. But because I’ve lived it.

And now I get to help others live it, too.

A yellow sticky note on a dark background with the handwritten words “How do I start?” above a black marker, symbolising a moment of self-reflection and new beginnings.
That question “How do I start?” is more powerful than it sounds. It’s not just about steps. It’s about being willing to pause, reflect, and choose consciously.

How to Start Finding Your Purpose

If you’re in the thick of it, here’s how to start uncovering your own purpose not just writing a purpose statement.


Phase 1: Notice the Frustration

What have you been searching for? When do you feel most “off track”?

This isn’t failure it’s a values signal.


Phase 2: Audit What You’ve Tried

What frameworks or tools have you used?

Which ones felt helpful? Which ones left you more confused?


Phase 3: Follow the Language Leaks

What words keep showing up in your life?

What do people say about you that you tend to dismiss?

Sometimes your purpose sounds too obvious to notice.


Phase 4: Look Back With New Eyes

List every job or role you’ve had.

Ask:

  • What did I love?

  • What drained me?

  • What role did I naturally play?

You’re not your job title, you’re the way you moved through that space.


Phase 5: Feel the Yes

Purpose doesn’t always come with fireworks. Sometimes it comes as a deep exhale.

When you say it out loud, do you soften? Do you stop second-guessing?

That’s a clue.


Phase 6: Let It Grow in Others

Now that you know your purpose, who benefits?

What can you give now that you used to hold back?

Purpose gets sharper the more you live it.

What If You’re Not Sure Yet?

That’s okay.

You’re not behind. You’re in it.

The discomfort you feel? That’s just your inner system telling you there’s more to uncover.

You don’t need a perfect phrase.

You just need a little more self-trust than self-judgement.

And maybe, a guide to help you start.

Want to explore this further?

If this article made something click, I’ve got a few tools that might help you keep going:

  • 🧭 Leadership Readiness Guide – for those who want to lead with purpose, not pressure

  • Leadership Growth Checklist – for turning self-awareness into confident action

  • 🔎 Leadership Success Guide – for mapping your strengths and next steps clearly

You can download them here (they’re free, real, and fluff-free):

And if you’d rather talk it through, I’d love to meet you where you’re at:


Thank you for reading,

Emma

Photo of Emma Schneider

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